Fame has become so important to humans, that they have now made it possible to be famous just for being famous.
Having a decent knowledge of Earth’s past might be useful when looking for a topic of discussion, say with a teenager. So here is a selection of prominent figures.
Einstein – a renowned genius constructed from various body-parts of other geniuses.
Shakespeare – a playwright responsible for numerous plays that nobody wants to admit they don’t really understand anything about any of the dialogue.
Hannibal – a cannibalistic serial killer, who went on a very long walking holiday with a herd of elephants.
Jane Austen – Wrote chick-lit for posh people.
George Washington – Became president, after chopping down a cherry tree. Possibly the easiest election win in US history.
Charles Darwin – A famous naturalist who realised mankind evolved from apes, after looking in the mirror.
Isaac Newton – invented gravity, but more famous for being the most patient person who ever existed, as he used to sit under trees for hours at a time, waiting for apples to hit him on the head.
The Brontes – A many-headed organism, also responsible for writing posh chick-lit.
Adolf Hitler – a very short and underdeveloped, xenophobic Austrian with dark hair, who wanted the entire planet to be tall, blond, muscular and German.
Jesus – The son of a carpenter. Apart from being the world’s greatest ever living magician, he was a good, kind man, who preached peace, love and everlasting life… So they nailed him to a piece of wood and waited for him to die.
Big Brother – Nobody knows who he is or what he looks like, but he watches everything you do, apparently.